Home

S05E22 – Mirror Mirror On the Wall (Part Two)

6 Comments

You guys! Remember that time Eudora ‘Chuckles’ McVeigh went all cray cray and blamed Our Heroine for her crap writing and her failed marriage and went up to Cabot Cove and drugged JB and gave her apples and stole her manuscript and then decided to solve the case of the dead PI while her husband had an affair with her agent and then Seth ate an apple and collapsed? Well now it’s time for some closure, and who doesn’t love a bit of closure.

While an anxious JB keeps vigil at Cabot Cove Hospital, Eudora lapping up the press attention after announcing she was going to help the Sheriff solve the case of the dead PI. She finds Lewis Bracken, her publisher, among the media scrum and he escorts her to a waiting taxi. Eudora is delighted with the attention that she’s generating for her new book.

Eudora's got a few kangaroos loose in the top paddock, if you know what I mean.

Eudora’s got a few kangaroos loose in the top paddock, if you know what I mean.

When Lewis reminds her that he’s still not going to publish her book, Eudora orders the taxi driver to pull over, and she storms out, saying that Lewis only came up to see Jessica. He denies it, and tells her that it’s only business anyway. That’s when Eudora drops the bombshell – she’s got a new book ready, it’s the best work she’s ever done.

Oh really.

Lewis asks her what it’s about but she’d rather not say just yet. Lewis is surprised by this, as Liza hadn’t said anything to him. Eudora tells him she hadn’t confided in anyone, but as soon as she checks into Hill House she will call Liza in New York and they can get to working on contract details. Lewis is confused – there’s no point calling Liza in the city, she’s at Hill House too – she was the one who called him about Eudora’s antics and so he flew up. Eudora is rather surprised by this news, but won’t elaborate.

Speaking of Hill House, Hank has just found his son Bobby who’d just come back from an adventure with a barmaid (ew), and tells him they’re leaving first thing in the morning. Bobby asks him if he’d sorted it out with Eudora and Hank says there’s nothing to sort – the marriage is over. Bobby doesn’t like the sound of that – what’s are they going to do, Eudora has all the money, but Hank says he survived for 20 years on his own before he met Eudora and there’s no “we”: Eudora doesn’t owe Hank anything and she sure as hell doesn’t owe Bobby anything. Cheer up Bobby, he says, you might actually like working.

While Eudora unpacks her things (side note, I’ve never unpacked my clothes in a hotel room in my life, is that weird?). she tells Liza there was no need for her to follow her to Cabot Cove – she doesn’t need a minder or a babysitter. Liza reminds her that the last time she saw Eudora she was making all kinds of crazy threats against JB.

Eudora is scandalized. She can’t believe Liza would think that. Liza says she was wrong, but asks Eudora to put herself in Liza’s place.

“Well that seems only fair, since for the last few months you’ve been putting yourself in mine.” Says Eudora.

Oh snap.

Oh snap.

Liza is flustered, but Eudora has more pressing concerns. She tells Liza if she wasn’t the best literary agent in New York Eudora would have clawed her eyes out weeks ago, and now she’s decided who she needs more – a literary agent or a husband.

Mmmmkay.

Back at the hospital JB gets a visit from Seth’s doctor – he’s going to be just fine. Yay! Jess asks him what it was, and the doctor tells her Seth was poisoned – they are soon interrupted by a nurse who comes in to tell them that Seth is asking for JB. JB walks in with tears in her eyes, and Seth tells her it’s nothing, just a touch of indigestion and blames his new diet. (People pass out from indigestion? Really Seth?). He’s horrified when JB informs him it was poison, but he guesses straight away what the culprit was – the apples on JB’s kitchen counter. JB and Mort retrieve the deadly apple from JB’s kitchen floor along with the rest and send them off to be analysed.

Crisis now seemingly averted, JB goes to see Eudora to have a little chat about the case of the stolen manuscript, which it just so happens Eudora is recording to tape and destroying her copy. She refuses to let Jessica open her suitcase where she’d hidden away the manuscript but before JB can get serious, Sheriff Metzger knocks on the door. The results are back, the apples were all poisoned.

Escorted to the cells, Eudora tells Jessica that she didn’t poison the apples, and that’s the truth. Jessica asks her if it’s the whole truth and Eudora finally admits to stealing the manuscript, desperate after Lewis told her to come up with something new and fresh. But she swears she had never seen the PI before and she had no idea why he was following her.

Out in the office Liza is begging to see Eudora, or at least a copy of Eudora’s new book but Mort informs her that a) Eudora wants to see JB but she doesn’t want to see Liza and b) Eudora stole the book from JB. She departs through the media pack outside the sheriff’s office just as Jessica emerges from the cells. Mort has a headache that he thinks will go away just as soon as he gets Eudora booked for the murder, then he can send her (and the media pack) off to Portland. The case is all wrapped up.

“Wrapped up? You mean you think she’s guilty?”

“Does Superman wear blue tights?” Says Mort.

Spoiler alert: he does. Henry Cavill wears Superman tights rather well, I have to say.

Spoiler alert: he does. I saw Man of Steel, and Henry Cavill wears Superman tights rather well, I have to say.

The Sheriff has a pretty good theory, it must be said. The syringe and rat poison used on the apples was found in JB’s trash, the motive was clear – cover up the theft of the manuscript, which is also why she killed the PI since he followed her when she went to copy the manuscript.

JB concedes this but then points out it doesn’t explain why Eudora was being followed by a PI to begin with. Mort will tell her exactly why Eudora was being followed…just as soon as he speaks to the PI’s partner in New York.  In the mean time, he begs her not to tell anyone about the apples, as it’s the sort of media hysteria that he’s just not in the mood for.

Meanwhile, over at the Hill House restaurant Liza is filling Hank in on the most recent developments when they get a surprise visit from Liza’s husband Victor, who turns up to get the room key. After he departs, Liza assures Hank that Victor doesn’t suspect anything. “Suspects? Liza, he knows.” Says Hank.

I’m starting to feel a bit sorry for Hank to be honest.

The next morning, Seth is feeling much better.

Seth mad! SETH SMASH!

Seth mad! SETH SMASH!

JB arrives just in time to hear Seth issue his demands for scrambled eggs and hot buttered toast and is delighted to see he’s feeling better.

NAWWWWWW

NAWWWWWW

Jess tells Seth it makes her feel so much better to hear him complain so much. Yesterday he was frail, frightened, humble, and she was terrified but today Seth his is grouchy irascible self and Jess feels much better.

**Actual quote.

**Actual quote.

To business. Seth wants to know if the apples test positive and Jess confirms it but tells him that only she, Eudora, Seth and Mort know that. Seth is convinced of Eudora’s guilt but Jess just isn’t sure. She promises to keep Seth in the loop and departs, just as the nurse returns with some scrambled eggs. Apparently the cook found some powdered eggs on the top shelf of the cupboard.

WHAT THE HELL ARE POWDERED EGGS??

JB’s next stop is the Sheriff’s office, where Mort has just got off the phone. JB asks to see the coroner’s report and his own report as something just doesn’t seem right. For one thing, they don’t know if the PI was following Eudora, he could have been following Hank Shipton.

Mort is furious, JB has stolen his thunder. The phone call he had was to the PI’s partner who said that a) Capeletti always carried heaps of money on him, which had clearly been stolen after he was killed and b) he’d been following Hank. He’s about to go talk to the person who hired him, Victor Casper. Liza’s husband.

DUN DUN DUN.

They find Victor having lunch down on the waterfront and plonk themselves down at his table. After some initial resistance, Victor tells them he hired the detective to prove his theory that Liza was having an affair with Hank, but when she proved a slippery suspect he told Capeletti to tail Hank instead. He didn’t know Capeletti had followed Hank to Cabot Cove until he heard the description of the dead man on the news at which time he consulted his attorney and came up to the Cove to find out what was happening. He had no intention of divorcing his wife, he tells them. Not until she’d sufficiently begged first.

What a knob.

What a knob.

After that charming encounter, Mort and JB take stock. Victor was in Atlantic City, probably being a dick. Liza was in the city, working late. And Hank and Bobby were at the Hill House. JB has a brainwave – if Capeletti went where Hank went, then Capeletti almost certainly went to the Hill House, meaning that his murder must have taken place there or somewhere near. Mort tells her he’ll get on it. They stop, noticing a brawl. When Mort steps in they discover it’s Bobby Shipton getting his butt kicked after refusing to pay up after a pool game. Mort and JB take him to the hospital, where he tells JB that he feels sorry for Eudora but that she’s clearly crazy. His father told him the night before that Eudora had tried to kill JB. Hank arrives to check on his son, and apologizes to Jess for Eudora’s behaviour. He’d tried to go in and see Eudora but she refused to see him.

Mort gets a phone call from Deputy Floyd, who has good news. They’ve found the murder site. Mort arrives to check it out, finds Capeletti’s glasses and tells Floyd to get on the horn to the forensics team, he wants them all over the site like graffiti on the Battery Park local.

j1

k2

Classic Floyd.

Classic Floyd.

Jess arrives at the Hill House and finds Hank and Liza walking back. They’d been at the murder site. Liza excuses herself and reminds Hank to take his insulin shot. Hank tells JB that they were determined to be together, even if it was not quite such a lavish lifestyle. JB figures Hank would get a decent settlement from Eudora but he tells her he signed a pre-nup: if he leaves Eudora he gets nothing, and might even owe Eudora money. He asks JB to tell Eudora he’s sorry for the way things turned out. He hadn’t seen her since she’d been arrested.

“Then you don’t know about the apples?” Jessica asks. She explains, but Hank is horrified. Jess thinks that she wasn’t the target, and it was more a case of someone wanting Eudora out of the way in prison. A sudden thought occurs to Jess. “Hank, where’s Bobby?”

A quick search of his room finds the gun holster belonging to Capeletti. Hank has an idea Bobby might have gone to get revenge on the dudes that beat him up, and when they arrive at the bar they find Bobby pointing Capeletti’s gun at anyone who moves.

Well that seems definitive.

Turns out Eudora wasn't the cray cray one they had to worry about.

Turns out Eudora wasn’t the cray cray one they had to worry about.

Yeah. Bobby was terrified at the thought of not having money and so went nuts. Well, more nuts probably.

Down at the Sheriff’s office Eudora is free to go, and Hank offers to drive her back to the inn. Jessica offers a handshake as she departs but Eudora just looks at her and leaves. Seth, newly released from hospital thinks she’s ungrateful, considering JB had just proved she wasn’t responsible. JB tells them it was a fluke – all she knew was that Bobby had poisoned the apples after he’d told her Hank had told him about the attempt on her life, which Hank couldn’t have known about because the only person who could have told him was Eudora. Or something. I got a bit distracted in this part.

Job done, Seth gives JB a lift home and tells her he’s going fishing the next morning if she’d care to join. Jess declines, saying she’s just worked out her new book and she needs to crack on. He tells her they will be leaving at 9ish if she changes her mind.

The next morning JB is fighting with her novel when she gets a knock on the door. It’s Eudora, with an apology. JB accepts, goes back to her book but has a change of heart. She hops on the Fletch-mobile and heads down to the docks, where Seth and Caleb are waiting. Seth tells her it was mechanical trouble, but Caleb tells her they waited, and the doc was mighty testy.

Jess unhooks the bowline, and off they sail. Shoutout to Zachary Brooks on Facebook who said this was originally intended to be the last episode of the series but they talked Angela around. It makes sense, this really felt like the end. But, there are still *gulp* seven more seasons of Murder She Wrote, which means seven more seasons of Murder, She Blogged.  Prepare yourselves.

And on that note,

Later Fletcherfans!

Later Fletcherfans!

 

Advertisements

S05E21 – Mirror, Mirror on the Wall (Part One)

4 Comments

Once upon a time, in a galaxy land far far away, there was an incredibly successful, award-winning mystery writer called Eudora McVeigh whom shall be known henceforth as Chuckles.

Classic Chuckles.

Classic Chuckles.

Poor Eudora isn’t having a good run just at the moment. Her husband is an idiot, her stepson is mooching off her and her publisher Lew Bracken has suggested she take a year off to er, recharge. Eudora refuses, and her agent Liza Caspar has an inkling why Lew is recommending some time off – word on the street is that Lew is about to sign JB Fletcher. Lew confesses that they are talking, but nothing is set in stone just yet. But JB’s last six books have been bestsellers and she’s about to get awarded Mystery Writer of the year, and Eudora…isn’t. Outraged, Eudora storms out, leaving Liza to demand answers. Lew tells her he doesn’t deal in subtlety – ever since Eudora married Hank Shipton her work has been mediocre. “Tell me something I don’t know.” Liza says.

Liza catches up to Eudora and tells her that there are plenty more publishers in the sea, but Eudora tells her Lew isn’t her problem. Her problem is she’s being “outflanked – out-written – by an English teacher from Maine.” Eudora’s writing career is in tatters, her marriage is hanging by a thread, and who does she have to thank for this? Dear, sweet, loveable Jessica Fletcher.

“You can’t blame her personally?” Says Liza.

“You’d be surprised what I can do, and will do, to get back on top.” Says Eudora and storms off into a taxi. At home later that night, Eudora picks a fight with her no-good husband Hank, and tells him his son Bobby has charged a VCR to her account – almost $400! (Ahahaha, the 80s). Hank takes off, leaving Eudora home alone with a JB Fletcher novel.

Meanwhile, in Cabot Cove, the sun is shining, the birds are singing and Our Heroine has just out-fished Seth Hazlitt. Surprisingly though,Seth isn’t that beat up about it, he’s just pleased that Jessica left her house. Jess tells him she’s been busy working on her book, and Seth tells her she’s always busy working on a book – in fact he wonders sometimes how she can tell them apart.

Shots fired.

Shots fired.

Back at Casa Fletcher JB demands to know what Seth meant by that remark, but he refuses to elaborate. He gets a temporary reprieve when the phone rings – Lew Bracken, saying he can be in Cabot Cove in 2 hours with contracts, but JB puts him off, saying she hasn’t made up her mind yet. Seth tries to make a hasty retreat but Jess isn’t letting him go until he explains himself.

Reluctantly he does. He reminds her about the hiking trip she backed out of to write an article, and the fishing trip to Rockford she turned down to have a meeting with her accountant. He thinks at their age they shouldn’t have to “rev the engine” as much as they used to.

“Are you saying I’m working too hard?” says Jess.

“I’m saying it seems that’s all you have time for.” Says Seth. “Have you even looked at your garden lately?” He knows that writing helped her get through the early days after Frank passed away, but Frank is a long time gone, and writing another bestseller isn’t going to bring Frank back, and if Frank were still here JB wouldn’t be spending half as much time chained to the typewriter, she’d be out smelling the salt air at sunrise.

SETH HAZLITT STOP MAKING JB CRY YOU BASTARD.

SETH HAZLITT STOP MAKING JB CRY YOU BASTARD.

And on that note, Seth departs. WHAT THE HELL SETH.

Later that afternoon, JB takes a subtle hint and gets out in the garden to attack the weeds when she receives a surprise visitor: Eudora McVeigh, and she hasn’t come empty handed.

So if Eudora is the Wicked Witch, and JB is Snow White, does this make Seth all seven dwarves?

So if Eudora is the Wicked Witch, and JB is Snow White, does this make Seth all seven dwarves?

Back in New York, Hank Shipton arrives home to find Eudora out and Bobby eating a sandwich. He passes and instead goes to take his insulin shot he forgot to have earlier. One can only assume this is important. That taken care of, Hank calls down to the front desk to find out where his wife is. The doorman has no idea, but knows that Eudora was asking for a map of Maine. Well that seems like a bit of a bloody giveaway doesn’t it?

Hank, concerned that Eudora is going to do something stupid, orders Bobby to bring the car around and they take off, closely followed by a man in glasses. SUSPICIOUS.

Meanwhile, Eudora and JB are finishing up dinner when Eudora decides she’d better get moving if she wants to find somewhere to stay for the night. She’s not going back to New York just yet, she tells JB, she wants to soak up some of this down east atmosphere, and since the Hill House is full she’s just going to have to find somewhere else.

Nonsense, says JB. You can stay here with me. Eudora is so grateful that she puts sleeping tablets in JB’s coffee, so that later she can break into Jess’s filing cabinet and read her new novel. Guys, I think Chuckles has a screw loose.

The next moring, JB wakes up feeling rough but finds Eudora in the kitchen cooking up breakfast. Jess goes to retrieve the morning paper and notices Eudora’s car has been moved. She asks Eudora about it but Eudora tells her she must be mistaken. They are interrupted by a ring at the doorbell – it’s Hank Shipton come to bring Eudora home. Chuckles orders him out. Before he leaves, he asks Jess if she’s okay – Eudora has been under a lot of pressure and has been acting a little crazy, but Jess tells him she’s fine, and Eudora’s fine. Hank tells her he and Bobby are staying at the Hill House, which surprises Jess. Apparently a practical joker rang and made phony bookings to book the place out, but when Hank and Bobby arrived there was plenty of room.

Jess and Eudora go on a walking tour of Cabot Cove. Eudora is unconvinced but Jess tells her the public library is good, the townspeople are friendly once they get to know you, and most of all the streets are safe.

Cue the arrival of Boy Scout Johnny, who has been sent by the scout leader to get the sheriff. They’ve found a dead body at the bottom of the cliffs. Jess and Eudora go to investigate – they have no idea who the dead person is, but we do. It’s the guy who followed Hank and Bobby out of New York.

DUN DUN DUN.

While the press have a field day taking photos of two famous mystery writers hanging out on a cliff, Sheriff Metzger and Seth deal with the newly retrieved body. Neither of them recognise him either, but Seth has worse news for Mort – the man was murdered somewhere else.

Mort drags JB away for a quiet word. He’s had enough. He’s been here a year, and this is his fifth murder – is Cabot Cove the death capital of Maine?

(Yes. Yes it is).

More to the point, they have no way of identifying the dead guy. On the contrary, says Eudora, popping up out of nowhere. Clearly the suit is an expensive one, and the watch is worth two grand, and that stain on his shirt is gun oil so he obviously carries his weapon in a shoulder holster.

e2

Heh heh heh

Heh heh heh

JB leaves Eudora to Marple Sheriff Metzger, and has a word with Seth. She’s thought about what he said and she does kind of agree with some…she supposes most of the things he said.

“You suppose right. Just because I’m an opinionated, self-righteous Yankee chauvinist doesn’t mean I’m wrong.” Says Seth.

THESE TWO THOUGH.

THESE TWO THOUGH.

Jess invites him around for dinner that night. She’ll make pot roast and he’ll bring around rhubarb pie.

Down in New York, Eudora’s agent Liza is still trying to find her client. Her husband Victor wanders in to ask her where she’d been the previous night, and she says out. She asks him the same question and he tells her he got home to find the house empty so went out to seek alternative companionship.

“Terrific. Was it a cash transaction?” Asks Liza. BURN.

Liza gets a phone call to turn on the TV. Eudora’s on the news – well a picture of her. In Maine. Hanging out with JB Fletcher. Liza takes off, leaving Victor alone to hear the description of the deceased. Not for nothing, I think he might know a little something something.

In the Cove, Eudora is getting ready to leave JB’s for a stint in the newly unbooked-up Hill House, and is carefully deflecting any questions about her car’s movements, what she put in JB’s coffee or what she’s got in her briefcase. Mort arrives just as she’s loading the car up, asking her if she’s leaving town. She tells him she’s planning to stay for a few days to solve – that is help solve – the murder. Mort appreciates that, being as they’ve just identified the victim as being a private detective from New York, who’s car had been abandoned up on the bluff with a piece of paper with Eudora’s name, address and phone number in it.

JB cares not for this development.

How very dare you.

How very dare you.

Mort escorts her down to the sheriff’s office to answer some questions. Eudora tells him that she’s sure that his position required rigid qualifications, but clearly intelligence isn’t one of them.

I think JB's had enough of your shit Eudora.

I think JB’s had enough of your shit Eudora.

Mort couldn’t care less. He wants to know just how she knew so much about a dead body she claims to never have seen before, and how long the PI had been working for Eudora. She tells him he wasn’t working for her.

“You know Sheriff, Ms Mcveigh didn’t spot any clues that weren’t fairly obvious.” Says JB sweetly.

“Well thank you Jessica. How sweet of you to make that observation.” Says Eudora.

YOU CAN'T OUT-FLETCHER FLETCHER.

YOU CAN’T OUT-FLETCHER FLETCHER.

Eudora informs the sheriff she can’t possibly be a suspect in the murder, since she was staying with JB at the time, and leaves. JB confronts her about the car, the sleeping pill and the copied manuscript but Eudora just screeches off in her car. Mort comes out to watch her depart and tells JB his theory – the murder, the body being dumped and the car being dumped happened at seperate locations. JB is sure he’ll solve the case, but for now she has shopping to do.

Over at Hill House, Liza has just arrived to see Eudora. Instead she finds Hank, and promptly makes out with him. Huh. That old chestnut. They agree that Eudora is out of control and Hank tries to call JB’s house to arrange to meet with her away from Eudora.

At Casa Fletcher, Seth has just let himself in but he phone stops ringing just as he picks it up. He takes JB’s pie dish, leaves a note and spots the apples sitting on the counter. He takes one and starts chowing down.

A short time later JB arrives home from the supermarket, and sees Seth’s car out the front. She goes inside, and finds Seth lying unresponsive on the floor.

Wait, Seth Hazlitt is Snow White?

See you next week Fletcherfans!

See you next week Fletcherfans!