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S12E03 – The Secret of Gila Junction

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Welcome to Gila Junction Arizona Fletcherfans, where apparently nothing ever happens except that’s a total lie because there’s a Masked Bandit roaming the desert and he’s just held up a poker game.

Also that an extremely lying lie a) a car just got shot off the road and b) the Queen is in town for a visit.

*tumbleweed, low key country music etc etc*

After being brushed off by the local man-who-fell-down-a-hole-as-a-boy-and-was-never-the-same-again aka Tiny Kerns, Jess meets the Sheriff who is also the town gas station attendant and explains her friend Norma Shey was supposed to meet her but hasn’t shown up. Sheriff Spencer, who has no need for a surname, tells her Norma probably got distracted on the kiln, but let’s go give her a call. There’s no answer but soon another call comes in – someone has found Norma’s car out in the desert but there’s no one inside.  They head out into the desert to see what’s up, and JB explains she’s not worried. Norma was once a prisoner of the Vietcong for a day before escaping – she was an AP reporter and could get out of any tight spot.

Meanwhile, over at the general store, local douchebag, Whitey Deaver, returns home to berate his wife Marge for not having a clean shirt ready for him so she takes off to meet her secret boyfriend Pete Menteer. She’s mad at him because he wasn’t around last night but he was apparently winning big at a craps game. He tries to give her some of his winnings but she won’t take it and they start making out instead. Tiny spots them and runs away, and Marge is worried word will get back to Whitey. Pete tells her not to worry about it, Tiny listens to him. Marge is sick of Gila Junction and wants to bail on it all but Pete says soon. Marge threatens to go without him, but in the short term goes to see her dad Cal Harding, bartender at the Grand Hotel, to mope. He feels bad about it all, but he’s got money problems of his own.

Over at the reception, Native American George Creech is checking in, a government employee sent to survey the road north of town for some potential widening. Pete manages to work in several mostly racist jokes including “How! Long you going to be in town?”

Classic early 90s racism.

“As long as it takes,” says George., and then snarls “You got a problem with that Pilgrim?”

“Who does he think he is?” Pete mumbles to himself as George walks off. Tiny wanders in to show Pete a banknote he found while he was digging for long lost treasure (TRAYSURE!) in the desert. Pete tells him the banknote is too new to be from Tiny’s mythical thirty-year-old treasure horde he apparently found when he fell down a hole and takes the banknote for safekeeping. Douchebag. Upstairs, George Creech studies a map for a while, circles Gila Junction and then tucks a gun into his pocket. This road must be intense.

Out in the desert, Spencer and his fiance Dena Harding (Fisheries and Wildlife employee, sister of Marge, daughter of Cal, oh god I sound like my mother), investigate the car. Dena explains she drove past, saw the footprints but lost the tracks in the hills. Jessica spots a bullet hole in the car tyre but before she can say anything a car rolls up containing Norma. “Looks like you called it, Mrs Fletcher!” Spencer says.

The look on her face needs to be bottled immediately.

Norma hobbles out of the car and is super apologetic, she got distracted looking at the scenery and went straight into a ditch. Jessica tries to mention the bullet hole but Norma shushes her. Back at Norma’s, JB gets a tour of her pottery studio but is more interested in who is taking potshots at her friend. Norma is convinced that there are shady shenanigans happening at the old army base on the outskirts of town, locals being poisoned, long abandoned chemical warfare research etc but she can’t get a straight answer out of anybody. Jess tells her it sounds serious, and she’s happy to stick around a few days and help run errands and cook and things but Norma wants JB’s help on the research. JB says OH HELL NO, so Norma says fine, she’ll do it herself, and starts to limp over to her desk. UGH FINE I’LL HELP, says Jess.

Unrelated but Charlie Sheen is doing an ad for an Australian car repair chain and it is so stupid.

Out in the desert, George Creech finds a car hidden away in a shed with some red dust on it. He is pleased with this. I think the road widening thing might have been a lie, you guys.

That night the entire town adjourns to the Grand Hotel (a situation I can relate to). Dena Harding gets a letter with a promotion and a job offer up near Seattle. Norma tells Cal she’s put Jessica to work but also she’s not going to move in. Cal’s creditor wanders in to assess the place, having decided Cal’s never going to find the money to keep himself afloat. Whitey wanders past Pete flunk out of his pinball game and declares “That’s what happens when you cheat, buddy boy!”

Outside, George finds some familiar red dust on Pete’s motorbike, while over the general store Tiny explains the Entire History of his Traysure hunt to JB. Whitey orders him back to work and then chats to JB about his army days until she starts asking him about being stationed at Fort Rosalyn, the old army base outside of town. He very swiftly hands over her change and tells her to have a nice day.

She sees you when you’re sleeping, she knows when you’re awake…

Back at the hotel, Cal warns Pete to stay away from his daughter, to which Pete asks which one. George Creech wanders in and Pete says “We’ve got a thirsty Native American! Or maybe we can’t sell firewater to redskins?” WAY TO BE A DICK PETE. George gives him a look and asks Cal for change for the jukebox and a glass of merlot, which presumably was also meant to be funny?

Out in the hallway, Spencer is begging Dena to let him come with her to Seattle but he just needs to sell the gas station. Pete wanders past and congratulates her on her new job and Spencer death stares him into oblivion. Later, George gets on the phone and tells his boss that things are progressing and he should be able to terminate matters in the next couple of days. Yeah, I really don’t think he’s terminating the road.

Later that evening Pete meets Marge out in the desert and tells her he can’t see her that night, he’s got things to take care of. She thinks he’s taking up with Dena again but he swears he isn’t and drives off into the sunset. Cue another crane shot.

Norma is very pleased with JB’s sleuth work that Whitey was connected to the old base. Jess thinks there’s something about Tiny’s story worth investigating but Norma has no time for that and has drawn up a plan of attack for tomorrow. Jess begs off and heads to bed. Norma receives a fax, and takes off into the night, just as Jess comes back to ask to borrow a thing.

The next day Tiny continues the Great Treasure Hunt when at last, success!

SO MUCH TRAYSURE

Tiny finds a suitcase full of cash dollars and receives a whack on the head from Whitey for his trouble. But things don’t end up too great for Whitey either because THE FIRST RULE OF THERMODYNAMICS IS DON’T BRING A KNIFE TO A GUNFIGHT*

Make a noise and make it clear = gunshot. Look I made myself laugh and I’m not going to lie I needed it.

 

*This might not be true, I’m not a doctor.

Gas Station Spencer swaps hats and starts investigating, but Tiny can’t tell him much – he found the treasure, got whacked and woke up with George Creech standing over him. George explains to JB that he was heading up to his survey site when he saw the pickup trucks and wondered if they needed help. The doctor informs them that it was most likely Whitey was killed by his own knife after struggling with his attacker. Spencer asks him if he’ll do tests, DNA that sort of thing and the doctor witheringly says, of course, Spencer, it’s standard procedure.

Spencer is not dealing with the pressure of murder in town but JB tells him he’s doing fine and she should know. It turns out Tiny hasn’t found his traysure, the banknotes are too new, but Jess thinks they’re onto the loot of the Truckstop bandit. They find a balaclava underneath the suitcase – it has a name tag stitched into it, it’s Whiteys. Whitey is the Truckstop Bandit. As they realise this, Marge drives up wanting to know if Whitey’s okay.

Back at the hotel, George calls his boss – one of the victims of the Truckstop Bandit at the poker game, who was relieved of his pinkie ring. George tells him about the murder, and they argue. Downstairs Pete eavesdrops on the whole thing. Over at Norma’s JB decides to review the incoming fax log, while Norma visits Cal at the bar and wants to know where he was the previous night. He tells her he drove out into the desert, sad that his daughter would be moving away – he didn’t know Norma would be coming over. She tells him she was coming over to tell him what JB has just discovered via the wonders of fax – there’s no such employee as George Creech at the roads department.  DUN DUN. Jess noticed that pesky red dust on George’s pickup truck matches the colour of the clay Norma uses and Spencer tells her that can only come from one place, near the army base. He’s on it.

Over at the general store, Marge and Pete talk it out – Marge thinks Pete killed Whitey and wants her cut of the money, but Pete tells her she’s a great girl but no. They argue, Pete storms out, Marge is furious.

JB decides to investigate George’s room but is forced into the closet when he returns unexpectedly.

Cunning plan is cunning.

Except he spots her.

Missed it by that much.

Spencer arrives to save the day but there’s no need – George is a private detective on the hunt for the Truckstop Bandit so he can retrieve his client’s ring, among other things presumably. It turns out he’s already spotted the ring – on Marge’s ring finger.

Over at the general store Marge tells them she found the ring among Whitey’s things with a big wad of cash but she still can’t believe he’s the bandit. Cal thinks it’s ironic that after all the risks Whitey took he didn’t get away with it. Marge agrees, saying all he managed to get was a pinky ring. Jess spots a gun on the wall and thinks it might be the gun that fired the warning shot before Whitey was murdered. Spencer later catches Pete about to leave town with a saddlebag full of money, which he confiscates.

Norma wants to get back to the coverup at the army base, but Jess has bad news on that front too – the only scandal to occur at the base was a payroll robbery that remains unsolved. Jess thinks Tiny found the money, then the thieves moved it and he’s been looking for it ever since. Norma gives up, but her clay covered hands give Jess an idea and she gives George a ring. She thinks she knows who the real Truckstop Bandit is.

Sure enough, she heads down to the general store and gets a confession.

GODDAMNIT MARGE

I must admit my estimation of Marge has gone up with this news. Jess tells her that only the bandit could have known that the stolen ring was a pinkie ring, not a regular ring (long bow, but I’ll allow it).  Marge admits to everything but swears she didn’t kill Whitey. Jessica agrees when she opens the blind. She knows exactly who it was and it’s all thanks to a twisted cord and a twisted seatbelt.

Part time sheriff, full-time killer. Coming soon to a theatre near you, if you’re unlucky.

Spencer, hot on Whitey’s tail, followed him to the desert, killed Whitey when he attacked him, and then took the money in the hope he could leave town with Dena.

And with that, Jessica gets back on the bus but not before the driver asks her if he was right about nothing ever happening in Gila Junction.

Later gang!

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S12E02 – A Quaking in Aspen

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We’re kicking off this week in Denver Fletcherfans, where a woman, a man, and a crime against humanity are out on the town.

The mullet was a travesty but the low scraggly ponytail is not better.

The night ends with ponytail dude being whacked on the head and dragged behind a car, which goes off a cliff in a fiery wreck the next day thanks to some budget-blowing work from the stunt department.

Meanwhile, in Aspen Lainey Sherman Boswell is strolling with her friend and lawyer Terry Folger and lamenting the state of her marriage when Sheriff Milo Pike rolls up with some bad news – Lainey’s husband has just died in a car accident. No need to lodge the divorce papers then I guess.

And then…

#helping

…JB is in town to appear on Lainey’s talk show but finds her old friend stressed out. The Sheriff is still asking questions about Grant Boswell and his relationship with Lainey – and her daughter Gina Sherman informs the sheriff that she liked her stepfather even less than her mother did.

Speaking of the sheriff…

(Supernatural, being just one)

Apparently, there’s been evidence that the car was rigged to blow up as it went over the cliff, but Jessica points out that all the items he’s referring to – a mercury switch, paint thinner accelerant – are all pretty commonplace items. He’s sure the investigation is going nowhere and tells Lainey not to worry as he departs. JB regrets not knowing Lainey’s husband better, but Lainey tells her she didn’t miss much.

Meanwhile, in Chicago, an insurance adjuster called Olivia Archer calls Terry to assure him that his client will receive the full 5 million due to her thanks to Grant Boswell’s life insurance policy. Terry is suspicious and after the call ends we can see why – Olivia has enlisted the help of everyone’s second favourite private detective.

I mean he’s great and all but ORBACH OR GO HOME.

Back at home, Terry’s paralegal Philip drops round some insurance paperwork for Lainie to sign. Lainie wants it known she’s not happy Terry hasn’t got the Sheriff to stop harassing her and he says he’ll pass the message on. On the way out he bumps into Gina and it’s clear he’d like to bump into her more often but she’s got a little something going with local writer Darman H Keene much to her mother’s disgust.

Cut to Darling Darman, who is on the phone pitching ideas to try and land a writing gig. The rise of rap music! Rap music as a metaphor for the decline of Western Civilization!

I’ve been on this tinder date. It was as much fun as you’re imagining.

Harold the editor tells Darman to get back to him, but instead, Darman booty calls a woman who has just arrived from Morocco with her husband. He’s off to look for money so she’s got nothing but time. Her husband, whose name is apparently Anthony Pembroke, grabs an envelope of cash from a payphone before running into Philip the paralegal.

Terry Folger wanders into a hotel where he bumps into a Howard Dietrich (Charlie’s cover for the case) and Charlie quickly snags him into a conversation that is soon derailed when JB wanders in and is delighted to see her old pal, Charlie. Charlie says she must be mistaken, his name is Howard and JB catches on. She wants to know all about how Howard’s mystery novel is coming.

MASTERS OF THEIR CRAFT

Over at Darling Darman’s place Gina walks in and cops an eyeful, Charlie sits down with JB over lunch and explains what he’s doing in Aspen. JB wants to let her friend know, but Charlie begs her to give him time so it looks like he’s earned his fee.

How can you say no to that face though really? Even if he’s not Jerry Orbach.

That night there are fireworks over Aspen as the Aspen Arts Festival kicks off. Darman makes a bit to interview JB for a rock magazine (is he meant to be Hunter S Thompson? Because no) and JB politely declines. Gina avoids Darman, Terry wants to chat to Howard/Charlie about stock options, and Lainie introduces her late husband’s niece to JB – it’s the girl from the start of the episode.  Then Sheriff Milo walks in and arrests Lainie for murder.

Disclaimer: I thought the niece and Mrs Pembroke were the same people until just now. Clearly, three coffees aren’t going to cut it.

Lainey is released on 1 million dollars bail, and Terry tells them he was lucky to get it down to that, the sheriff has a strong eyewitness who saw Lainie buying the things that were used to rig the car to blow. The next day Charlie gets a phone call from the insurance company saying he’s off the case, there’s no money to pay out now that Lainey has been arrested for murder. As he leaves the hotel lobby he bumps into a Mr Vernon – the friend of one of Howard Dietrich’s clients. It would appear that Howard Dietrich is a real person, good job Olivia. Meanwhile, Darman pitches the story of how he was about to get engaged to Gina when her mother was arrested, but his editor will only publish if he can get the name of the eyewitness – which inexplicably Mrs Pembroke can, because the eyewitness is her husband Anthony Pembroke.

Philip is trying to comfort Gina when they run into Darman who begs Gina to take him back and because she’s a blithering idiot, she does. As they walk off on a dejected Philip Darman begins to subtly interrogate Gina about her childhood.  Over at the sheriff’s office, Charlie tries to find out just what Milo knows but Milo isn’t talking. Philip takes matters into his own hands and breaks into Darman’s office to steal a copy of the article he’s writing about Gina.

Charlie has a sit down with JB to try and work it all out.

Never let it be said that I’m not on point. Floss floss dab Fortnite.

Charlie is word vomiting all over the place but fortunately, Jessica notices they have an audience – Mr Vernon, the man who knows the real Howard Dietrich. Lainie arrives to take Jessica to the studio, and when Jess excuses herself to make a quick phone call Mr Vernon has vanished.

Back at Lainies after the show, Terry rolls in to inform them that Lainie will be indicted for murder and that Anthony Pembroke swears he saw her buying the things in the hardware store – a day conveniently blank in Lainie’s planner when she checks it. Philip drops the article around to Gina and she finally admits Darman is a douche canoe.

That night, Vernon calls someone and says that the indictment is going to screw them up, and they need to work out who is lying. Charlie tails Pembroke down a dark alley and receives a whack on his head for his trouble. Pembroke receives two bullets.

The next day JB is at the sheriff’s office providing an alibi for Lainie at the time of the shooting (Gina’s alibi is less solid) when she sees a photo that confirms Charlie had been at the scene of the crime. Charlie, meanwhile, is over asking the newly widowed Mrs Pembroke why her husband had wanted to invest with him, but she doesn’t know where the money was coming from and frankly, it’s a bit soon. The sheriff arrives and Charlie quickly departs.

Philip and Terry have a coffee break – Philip is concerned to see that win or lose Terry will get everything that Lainie owns as collateral. Terry tells him that’s how capital cases work. Nancy-the-niece wanders in to tell Terry that she’s met Howard Dietrich before, and that’s not Howard Dietrich, causing Terry to put a call in to Olivia Archer at the insurance agency who promptly calls and yells at Charlie to back off. JB arrives, demanding answers.

EVERYTHING IS FINE

Charlie tells Jessica he was there when Pembrooke got whacked. Jessica tells him she’s found out that Pembrook isn’t his real name, it’s O’Brien, and he doesn’t have any money. Charlie tells her that Mrs Pembrook was disinherited by her parents when she married Anthony so she’s got no money either. Clearly, Anthony was getting money for his testimony, but where from? The sheriff pops in to tell them both he’s mad at them and not to leave town.

Charlie and JB break into the Pembrook’s room at the hotel and find a note with the time and place of Pembrook’s meeting. JB also finds first class tickets from Morocco and she has an idea of who has been bankrolling this whole operation.

Shady shady lawyer

Apparently, Terry had arranged for Anthony to lie and say he saw Lainie buying all the things so that he’d get her assets because it turns out he’s not a very good lawyer. But he’s not a killer.

Because as it turns out…

Absolutely did not see this coming. One beard looks like another tbh

…Grant Boswell and his ladyfriend Nancy Grayson (aka his fake niece) cooked up the whole scheme to claim the insurance money and killed Pembrook when he started unwittingly messing with their plans.

So with the insurance policy null and void, Charlie goes home empty-handed, but JB spots Gina and Philip making out and declares that the two biggest beneficiaries weren’t even on the policy.

Yellow card for that.

Later gang!

S12E01 – Nailed

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Fletcherfans! Welcome to 2019 and welcome to the last season of Murder She Wrote. Who’dve thunk it? Certainly not me, I can barely commit to a hairdresser, but here we are.

SPEAKING OF HAIRDRESSERS! We are back in the Newest of Yorks, where there are cops driving and people abseiling off buildings and running around with bloody knives. You know, the usual. JB is getting her hair and her nails did simultaneously at Antoinette’s on Fifth Avenue, and being treated like the Queen she is. Her hairdresser Jimmy has to rush off to a TV demonstration on Nancy Rayburn’s TV show, leaving the manicurist Diane to deliver the news to JB – Diane and Jimmy are engaged which is all terribly exciting.

My celebratory drink of choice for weddings, engagements, births, making it to the weekend…

Lieutenant Sam Kriley inexplicably wanders into the salon to get a guest list from JB – apparently, all the abseiling and knives and cops was a result of JB’s friend Agnes returning home early from a museum board meeting and surprising a burglar. Kriley is convinced that it’s the work of the same burglar targeting high-end apartments all over Manhattan and that Agnes was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, but she will recover.

Jessica bumps into fellow board member Kathy Stafford is also at the salon (clearly they get a group discount) and is a) relieved that Agnes will recover and b) will have the meeting minutes faxed over tomorrow. Jess then runs into fellow mystery writer Steve Burke, who is working in the salon as research for his novel, which JB is loving apparently.

Over at Nancy Rayburn’s TV show, Jimmy runs into Ralph Stafford, who I assume is Kathy’s husband. Jimmy and Ralph are planning to go into business but Jimmy’s getting cold feet and Ralph’s not having a bar of it. Also, Nancy is totally having a fling with Ralph and is ignoring her producer Madelyn Sweetzer’s warnings about how shady he is, even while he’s on the phone being yelled at by business partners.

Back at the salon…

BEHOLD ITS INFINITE MAJESTY

…JB still hasn’t left yet but is giving a big bag of books to the salon owner, the aforementioned Antoinette. Side note, I binged that Marie Kondo show on Netflix and I learned that a) compared to most people I don’t own any clothes at all, and b) KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY BOOKS MARIE. In my defence, I drunkenly counted how many books I owned last year and guys it wasn’t great. But I got rid of like twenty! And bought about forty, look it’s the circle of life whatever it’s fine don’t worry about it.

Anyway, the bag of books is a donation for a school raffle and Antoinette is stoked about it. She’s less stoked about the persistent rumours that Jimmy is leaving her salon, and JB says there’s no proof it’s happening. Antoinette’s still worried though, Jimmy has VIP clients all over the place and if he goes so do they.

Phoebe the receptionist goes on break, leaving Steve to cover the phones and fetch nail polish colours for nail technicians. Nancy swans in for her appointment with Jimmy. She bumps into Kathy Stafford, who tells her that she’s had several discussions with her husband and she’s made it clear that she won’t put up with his fooling around. Nancy says “That’s the hellraiser I knew in college!”

#awkward.

Kathy meets Ralph for lunch at the Cafe Metropole, and he helpfully doesn’t notice her new hairdo. The head waiter at the cafe sends his best wishes to Agnes for a speedy recovery – then gets a phone call from someone in which he says it wasn’t his fault Agnes came home early, they’re just lucky she didn’t see his face. Meanwhile, Ralph gets a prized silver dollar off Kathy to use as collateral to get Jimmy’s hair salon off the ground.

Jess wanders down to the precinct to give Kriley a helpful tip – at least three of the burglary victims were clients at Antoinette’s, there was a good chance that someone there was in on the whole thing. Kriley says thanks, he’s off to chat to Agnes and will drop JB off on the way. Meanwhile, Ralph meets a shady guy off a bus who has made a counterfeit of the silver dollar. He tells Ralph a true collector will spot the fake immediately, and to forget his name.

That night at closing time, Phoebe the receptionist puts Steve in charge of straightening everything up. He checks on Antoinette, who tells him she’ll close up, but needs him to drop a pair of glasses belonging to Nancy Rayburn around to her apartment. Diane warns Jimmy about leaving Antoinette to get involved in Ralph’s shady shenanigans and says he hits on her every time he’s in the salon, to which Jimmy says “Can I blame him?”

ZZZZT. WRONG ANSWER, TRY AGAIN DUMBASS. Antoinette overhears everything and watches them go, gulping what I assume is bourbon. In the car park, Phoebe runs into Ralph who wants her help finding out who is talking Jimmy out of signing the contract. He offers Phoebe (who used to date Jimmy back in the day) the manager role at Jimmy’s salon, and she says she doesn’t know much but she knows someone who might.

Across town, Ralph drops in on Nancy and gives her the silver dollar (code, but also not code) as collateral for a cheque for 400K that she’s giving him. They make out in the doorway for a while before he leaves, not noticing his wife hiding in the corridor crying. Brutal.

Even later that night, Steve drops around Nancy’s place to deliver the glasses and interrupts the burglar stealing the silver dollar. He gets whacked on the head, and the burglar legs it.

The next morning Jessica rolls into the precinct office, the recipient of Steve’s one phone call – the NYPD found him on the floor next to an empty silver dollar box and arrested him for burglary. Old mate is not having a good day. Jess vouches for him and tells Kriley that half of Manhattan new Nancy wasn’t going to be home the previous night. Curiously, there is no mention of the silver dollar in the list of stolen things. Funny that.

Ralph the Creep is at Antoinette’s getting his nails done when he finds out about the burglary and calls Nancy. She tells him she didn’t report the silver dollar being stolen so that Kathy wouldn’t find out about it, but since it’s insured no problem right? Also, she needs new collateral or her 400K back.

Ralph decides to change course and has a little word with Diane about how he thinks she will convince Jimmy to sign the contract. Across town, old mate head waiter has just discovered the coin is a fake, while Jimmy delivers the bad news to Antoinette. He’s off to start his own salon with Ralph.

Ralphy boy is summoned to a meeting with the head waiter, whose name is apparently Billy, who wants 50K or he will tell Kathy and Nancy all about Ralph’s double cross. Ralph laughs and says now that he knows who the Uptown Burglar is he’ll be off to the police thank you very much. Unbeknownst to the pair of them, Nancy’s producer Madelyn Sweetzer is sitting at the next table and hears the whole thing. Good lord this episode is exhausting.

Down at the TV station, Madelyn delivers the news to Nancy, who is stunned – even more so when Madelyn informs her that the show has been cancelled and will finish at the end of the month. Kathy appears to confront her but Madelyn says she’ll meet her at a bar around the corner.

Later that night there’s a party to farewell Jimmy from Antoinette’s salon, but no one really seems that celebratory apart from Wreck-it Ralph. Jimmy and Diane seem nervous, JB is sad, and Kathy Stafford is morose. Antoinette makes an appearance, but storms off after Ralph tells her they could have been partners but these days he likes to have younger, prettier faces around him.

Ralph later went on to become president. I mean, wait, what?

Antoinette bumps into Jess and they commiserate – she misplaces her bag but it turns up on the bar. Steve arrives late, after borrowing a suit from his brother. Ralph gets a note from Jimmy asking to meet him at Antoinette’s after the party. Phoebe arrives just as JB is leaving, and wants to hear about Steve’s book progress.

Cut to Antoinette’s salon, where Jimmy walks into a room and Ralph is dead in a chair, a pair of scissors sticking out of his back. Good riddance.

The next day, Kriley is all over the crime scene – Jimmy doesn’t appear to admit to being in the salon the night before but does admit the scissors are his. Apparently, it was Steve who found the body when he came in to open up. The silver dollar was left on the bench, ruling out a burglary. Steve is getting into the detecting business with Jess and swears there’s something missing from the station where Ralph died.

Outside, Diane confesses to Jimmy that Ralph had the dirt on her – specifically how she made a living when she was kicked out of home aged 16. Jimmy tells her he doesn’t care about that, he likes her now. Better answer Jimmy. Down at the Cafe Metropole Billy gets a call from his partner saying that Ralph’s death meant they were off the hook, but Billy is worried about the silver dollar boxes. Turns out he should be more worried about police taps, Kriley has heard the whole thing. He can’t place the voice on the other end of the call, but Jessica can.

They head down to Antoinette’s and despite her protests of innocence, Phoebe is arrested. Antoinette is also taken downtown when it’s discovered her prints are on the scissors. Jessica thinks this is a weak case, but Kriley is convinced.

Preach it sister.

Kriley is convinced he’s got it all sorted but Jess has other ideas. She recruits Steve to help her set the trap et voila!

This I did not see coming.

Instead of being mad that Ralph treated them both terribly, they teamed up and murdered him. Fair play really. Something to do with non-matching nail polish that I missed because I started googling my family tree.

Anyway. Onwards!

Later gang!